Book Excerpt: Kidnap_Mitch_Home_of_the_Wierd_Shop

Home of the Wierd Shop

MITCH

I was good at skipping school. I didn’t feel like I was failing at it, I thought maybe by some miracle I’d graduate. But getting a degree wasn’t even on my palette, you know what I mean, I didn’t care. I knew there were other ways to get by. With all that stuff with my grandmother, I’d had a taste of so much. I knew I could survive anywhere; doing anything.

It bothered Suzy that I didn’t go to school. I always attended the first two periods. Then by 10, 10:30 I’d go to Arthur Treachers, as it opened. It was kind of a covert operation. Because I didn’t have any right to be working there. I was young. You had to have a work permit back then, and I didn’t have a work permit. So the fish and chips business didn’t work out for me. I got the job at the Arco Station after that.

I didn’t need Wiley High School. I had money coming in. I had a ’62 Thunderbird. My own car. Bought it from a bear named Reggie. He was two years older than me at school. Suzy’s mom, Iona kept it for me at her shop.

Iona owned a yarn shop. Wait, not a yarn shop a weird shop. She had different hangings and shit. Iona’s husband was Richard. He was an importer. Richard was out of town constantly. Iona’s brother, Suzy’s uncle, owned Wright Airlines. His was the first regional airline in the US. The family did well.

During the day, Suzy was in school, but I would go to her house on Milton Road in University Heights as the school-day ended. It was always the five of us who would hang out there. Suzy and me, Suzy’s older sister Cindy, her boyfriend Doug Clark and of course, Iona.

They all used to smoke weed. Doug smoked weed, Suzy smoked weed, Iona smoked weed. I didn’t smoke weed. I was a typical mischievous 14 year old boy with my boyfriends. You know, like lighting off rockets and ringing doorbells and then running away. But I had the talk. I was better at it then than I am now.

Doug used to get with Cindy and Iona. Iona always cockblocked Cindy. He was trying to get Suzy too, but Suzy was with me. I didn’t like him. He acted like a fag. He really did. No, I don’t think he was gay. It was like the rich straight act. He thought he was at the top of the world. But the more I think about it now, Doug Clark was probably using both of them. Iona for her money and getting him weed and Cindy for…well, you know.

Cindy was a year or two older. She was 16. She had a driver’s license. Richard had a 71 Olds 98. He bought Cindy a 73 firebird, brand new. We used to use her for that.

I thought I was gold.