Why vs. Because: A Travelogue about Love

I interviewed my parents about who they were when Mitch came around. In other words, when they took him in as a foster child. I knew they were young, but it was a good reminder that their mindsets were shaped by fewer adult experiences and moreso by their youth and their interaction with their parents. I was also curious to know what their thoughts were about love and money—two themes we (my mother and I) believed would not only be present but would be at odds in our book. They indulged me. ?Porque? [Why.] (Please note the first question mark should be upside down and backwards but I couldn’t find that key on my computer. If you know where it is, let me know.) Porque. [Because.]

The summer after fifth grade my sister spent half her summer on the beaches of Valencia, Spain (click the Valencia, Spain link to armchair travel there) and then brought her exchange student home with her to our house in the midwest. I didn’t know Spanish back then because in Iowa (and perhaps the remainder of the US?) languages were introduced in middle school. But I still remember my first Spanish word,“Porque.”

The three of us were floating in the pool (click the pool link to view the swimming pool in which we floated) and the two of them said “porque” back and forth to one another over and over again. Porque in Spanish can mean “why” or “because.” What was a silly game of duality and knowledge trumping for them has become for me a fundamental life tool.

Just because I know someone, that does not mean I know exactly what they do and why. I’ve constantly learned that it is important to question the answer. Because what I take for granted, what I believe I know is not always the situation. Turned out that my mom took Mitch in because she wanted to love beyond her family. My dad on the other hand knew how to be a team player. He knew that my mother’s will was stronger than his opposition, so he conceded to her wishes. My mother knew money could differentiate but neither of them thought it could bring them success. My lesson was how the world could change if only more of us could do things just because.